Where the Hell Is Tesla:

Sci-fi odyssey. Comedy. Love story. And of course, Nikola Tesla.



I'll let Chip, the main character, tell you more: "I found the journal at work. Well, I don't know if you'd call it work, but that's where I found it. It's the lost journal of Nikola Tesla, one of the greatest inventors and visionaries ever. Before he died in 1943, he kept a notebook filled with spectacular claims and outrageous plans. One of these plans was for an “INTERDIMENSIONAL TRANSFER APPARATUS" - that allowed someone (in this case me and my friend Pete) to travel to other versions of the infinite possibilities around us. Crazy, right? But that's just where the crazy starts."



Chip's Official Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. The events depicted in the collection of emails did not happen. I have never been in contact with a covert government group attempting to suppress knowledge of the lost journal of Nikola Tesla. I have not been threatened with death if I divulge the secrets contained inside. They did not buy me this handsome jacket (oh crap, you're listening to this - trust me, it looks great on me). They did not come to my place, and liquor me up, and offer to publish this book as a sci-fi comedy novel to throw the public off the trail of the real truth.



    Don't Touch the Blue Stuff!:

Something called the “Blue Juice" is coming. For all of us.



Luckily, me (Chip Collins), Pete, Nikola Tesla, Bobo, and FBI Agent Gina Phillips are here to kick its ass, and send it back to last Tuesday. Maybe. Or maybe we'll fail, and everyone in the multiverse is doomed. (Seriously, you might want to get that underground bunker ready.) Either way, I've got to get home to Julie and find out – woah, I'm not about to tell you that right here in the book description! TMI, dude.



WARNING: If you haven't heard Where the Hell is Tesla?, I apologize in advance, as you might get completely freaking lost. If you do, just call my apartment, I'm usually around, and I'll fill you in. (If I'm not stuck in the ITA.) – Chip



    Gigi Make Paradox:

Listen, having kids is great, my little Gigi Collins and Pete’s daughter Hannah are sweet little fluffs of cotton candy, spun from the silk of fairy spiders who live in the clouds. But man, can they cause trouble. Seriously, you’d think a two-year-old couldn’t possibly threaten the very existence of our physical reality, but, well, you know where this is going.



So join me and Pete, and Bobo, and of course the man himself, Nikola Tesla, on another spine-tingling, bowel-loosening thrill ride, and remember: bring your adult diapers.



Warning: If you haven’t listened to Where the Hell is Tesla? and Don’t Touch the Blue Stuff! (Where the Hell is Tesla? Book 2), I apologize in advance, as you might get completely freaking lost. If you do, just call my apartment, if I’m not watching Gigi I’ll try to pick up the phone, and I’ll fill you in. (Assuming our physical reality still exists.)



Unabridged

Narrated By: Rob Dircks

Format: MP3

Bitrate: 64kbps